whimsy
by finn mertins
Summary: Kalinka's graduated high school, and Roll doesn't quite know what to do with herself. Nothing a heart-to-heart talk won't solve (maybe).


Roll sensed something cool on her back—it took a few moments to process it, but she turned herself around on her bed and found her older brother forcing his way into her window.

"Hey!" she barked, standing up suddenly and pressing her hands against the glass. "Why can't you enter buildings the traditional way?"

"'Cause then your jackass father would see me," Blues said. "Let me in, please."

There was a long moment where Roll hesitated, but she sat back down on her bed. Blues tottered and nearly lost his balance; he'd managed well enough.

"What's up, then? I don't like being here."

So forward.

"You knew something was wrong?" Roll asked. Stupid, she thought.

"Well, yes. We're technically…sort of siblings. It's like that with humans, too, isn't it? They can tell when something's up."

"It's Kalinka," she admitted easily. Perhaps if she was as stubborn as a normal, human girl she would've stalled a bit longer, but something about Blues—maybe he was just too intimidating—made her lose her will. "She's going to college."

"She's that old now?" Blues wondered.

"Yeah."

"Robotics or no?"

"I dunno. I think she wants to be a cop, but…I dunno." Roll frowned.

"Really. I didn't think that'd be something she'd be interested in…" but then again, he wasn't her best friend.

"Sure!" Roll chirped. "She's…real tough, actually! She used to be real small and shaky but she grew taller than you, I think—"

"Taller than me?"

"Yeah! She's a babe now. Her words—not mine."

Blues half-smiled. "Are you sad because you won't get to see her?"

Roll fell silent. She seemed to be thinking about something, but Blues couldn't see past the steely expression she donned. After a few minutes—maybe a lot more than that, Blues couldn't quite tell now—she stood and closed the window behind him.

"It was getting cold," she said.

"Don't avoid my question."

"Why not?"

"Come on. You know if you tell someone…you'll probably feel a lot better about it."

"Then why don't you tell anyone about your problems?"

"Ah, touche. But no one cares about a prototype. Just tell me."

Roll pulled her bow out of her hair and tied it up again; this was a tic that meant she was very, very upset.

"I'm upset because…it's not fair! She gets to grow up and have boyfriends and get married and have a job and…and…I'm stuck housekeeping as a little girl. Forever," she stressed the last word.

"That's selfish," Blues said. His honesty was like a blow to the chest—in fact, she felt it constricting. Even though she seemed to desire to be human so badly, she hated that she felt so much like one. "And you know it's more than petty jealousy."

"I…I guess so. I miss her. We used to go shopping all the time—or! Or we'd talk about boy bands and we'd listen to music all night—her dad would get super angry!"

Roll slumped against her pillows suddenly. She'd be missing all of that, wouldn't she? Kalinka would make new friends…she'd forget…

"She won't forget about you," Blues countered. "She'll make new friends, maybe. She'll be busy…but she won't forget you. You're…something special, definitely."

Now Roll felt a surge of—gratefulness? Embarassment? Pride? Blues was so confusing, criticizing people and then praising them.

"Yeah! I guess! Yeah. I'll have to make new friends, too."

Blues seemed to hesitate before he put a hand on her shoulder, almost in an approving parent sort of way.

"But I'm still…I feel strange. Is that normal?"

"Sure. Humans take things very…hard. You're smart enough to know about that already. I don't know exactly what…" he took a long pause, "…what…you were programmed to feel like, but you'll get over it. Maybe in a few days or weeks. Or maybe years?"

"…hey, that's not reassuring."

"It sort of is."

"No way!" Roll shoved Blues' hand away—but not harshly. She allowed herself a small smile.

"I'm the older sibling, so you can't argue with my logic."

"Sure I can! Just 'cause you're older doesn't mean you're not super dumb!"

Blues let out an amused whistle.

"Hey, now. You're hurting my feelings," he said. However, he delivered all of his words so calmly and evenly it was hard to tell what he was trying to convey.

"Yeah, yeah! Hey… y'know, you should probably get going before Rock finds out you're here."

"I…yeah. Probably."

Roll frowned. Why was he so difficult to read?

"What? Do ya have anywhere to go or are you a bum?"

"I—I have somewhere to go! I just…"

Roll clasped her hands together.

"Hey! Weren't you the one who just told me that telling people their problems helps? I can't know if you keep that straight face all the time!"

"…it gets uncomfortable, sleeping in such odd places—"

"Odd places? I thought you had a place to go!"

"—don't interrupt. Anyway, I sort of miss living in a house…I'd just like to stay for…not even a night. I don't want—" I don't want him to know I was here.

Roll understood, sucking in her lip.

"You're not sleepin' in my room."

Blues let out a noise of frustration—half-whistle, half-grumble.

"But Rock—"

"He's your younger sibling, too! Beggars can't be choosers, mister."

"…yeah, yeah."


End file.
